"Who I Am Not," a 2023 documentary directed by Tünde Skovrán, offers an in-depth and compelling exploration of identity, gender, and the intersex experience. Centered around the lives of Sharon-Rose Khumalo and Dimakatso Sebidi, two intersex individuals in South Africa, the film navigates the emotional, personal, and societal challenges they face while shedding light on the complex realities of being intersex in a world built on binary gender distinctions.
At the heart of the documentary is Sharon-Rose Khumalo, a South African beauty queen who has, up until her adulthood, lived as a woman. She has won beauty pageants, works at a pharmaceutical company, and enjoys a comfortable middle-class life. However, Sharon-Rose is confronted with an identity crisis when she discovers that her reproductive organs are not functioning as expected and that her body contains both male and female chromosomes. This revelation sends her into a deep existential crisis, leading her to question her place in a world that demands strict adherence to gender norms and where a woman’s ability to bear children is often seen as fundamental to her happiness and societal value. In her search for guidance and a sense of self-acceptance, Sharon-Rose meets Dimakatso Sebidi, an intersex activist who challenges traditional gender roles and presents a contrasting approach to gender identity.
Unlike Sharon-Rose, who is largely perceived as feminine in appearance, Dimakatso presents as more masculine and prefers the pronouns they/them. Dimakatso's path is filled with activism, personal struggles, and a quest for acceptance, especially in a society that often excludes them due to their non-binary appearance. Dimakatso has been rejected from many jobs and lives in difficult financial circumstances, contrasted with Sharon-Rose’s more privileged existence. The documentary weaves together their individual stories, illustrating how the two intersex individuals navigate the tension between personal identity and societal expectation.
Through intimate moments, "Who I Am Not" offers viewers a window into the struggles, joys, and revelations that Sharon-Rose and Dimakatso experience as they grapple with their bodies, their identities, and the world around them. As the two characters embark on separate but parallel journeys of self-discovery, they participate in medical examinations to understand their biological intersexuality, engage in activist groups to raise awareness, and confront their friends, family, and partners about their true selves. Director Tünde Skovrán, whose debut documentary "Who I Am Not" brings the stories of Sharon-Rose and Dimakatso to the screen, sees the film as more than just a documentaryit is a personal and transformative journey.
For Skovrán, diving into the intersex community was an eye-opening experience, and the stories of Sharon-Rose and Dimakatso felt like ones that had long been waiting to be shared. Through her lens, we see the struggles of those living beyond societal binaries, and the weight of the emotions they carry as they navigate their intersex identities. The film not only highlights the personal stories of Sharon-Rose and Dimakatso, but also underscores their activism. Dimakatso, in particular, is a champion for intersex children in South Africa, founding initiatives like a Summer Camp for intersex youth to foster understanding and provide a sense of belonging.
Through these grassroots efforts, Dimakatso becomes a beacon of hope for those whose voices have been silenced, challenging the dominant norms of a society that has long neglected the experiences of intersex people. Skovrán’s documentary beautifully captures Dimakatso’s passion for social change and human rights, creating a compelling narrative of resistance against a world that is often indifferent to their struggles. Skovrán’s use of innovative filmmaking techniques, including group therapy, psychodrama, and dream interpretation, elevates the storytelling, providing emotional depth and making the audience not just passive viewers but active participants in the characters’ journeys.
The inclusion of dream sequences, raw emotional exchanges, and intimate moments with Sharon-Rose and Dimakatso allows for an experience that is both visually striking and deeply emotional. These moments invite viewers to reflect on their own perceptions of gender, identity, and the binaries that dominate society. The visual language of the film is equally powerful, with symbolic images, such as a sequence where Sharon-Rose dives into the water of her bathtub, only for Dimakatso to emerge in her place, illustrating the fluidity of gender and the shared experiences of the two characters. This image poignantly conveys their intertwined experiences while exploring the complexity of their identities.
It also visually reinforces the idea that, despite their differences, Sharon-Rose and Dimakatso’s shared intersex experience unites them on a profound level. However, the film does not shy away from the fact that there are significant differences between the characters, particularly in terms of social class and the varying degrees of privilege they experience. Sharon-Rose, born into an affluent family, has the financial and social resources to navigate the challenges of her intersex identity in a way that Dimakatso, who faces financial instability and social exclusion, cannot. The film briefly touches on these discrepancies, but it does not fully delve into how class, race, and economic privilege intersect with their experiences of intersex identity.
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The absence of this more nuanced analysis may leave some viewers with an incomplete understanding of the wider social forces at play. By focusing primarily on the individual struggles of Sharon-Rose and Dimakatso, "Who I Am Not" promotes a narrative of personal enlightenment and individual growth. While this approach serves to humanize and create empathy for the characters, it may also risk overshadowing the structural and collective issues that impact intersex people. The film implicitly suggests that the solution to the challenges intersex individuals face lies in personal acceptance and awareness rather than collective action to dismantle oppressive systems. This personalistic approach, though powerful in its emotional resonance, may miss the opportunity to challenge the broader societal and institutional structures that perpetuate inequality. "Who I Am Not" also touches on the important role of activist communities in providing support, solidarity, and a platform for change. However, it does so in a relatively understated manner, failing to explore in depth how the activist groups where Sharon-Rose and Dimakatso meet contribute to their development as individuals and as a collective.
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The absence of such details highlights a limitation of the film’s focus on personal journeys over broader structural change. By avoiding a deeper exploration of intersex activism, the film misses an opportunity to highlight how such movements can be instrumental in challenging societal norms and bringing about meaningful change. Despite these criticisms, "Who I Am Not" remains a significant and thought-provoking work. It brings attention to an underrepresented communityintersex individualsand provides a platform for their voices to be heard. Through the personal stories of Sharon-Rose and Dimakatso, the film not only raises awareness about the lived experiences of intersex people but also challenges audiences to reconsider their assumptions about gender, identity, and the categories that define human beings. The documentary has received attention at international film festivals, sparking conversations and urging viewers to reconsider their beliefs about gender and biological identity. It serves as a call to action, inviting audiences to think more deeply about the societal constructs that divide people into rigid categories and the need for greater acceptance and understanding of those who do not fit neatly into these boxes.
Ultimately, "Who I Am Not" is a film that seeks to illuminate the beauty and complexity of human identity in all its forms. Through the intimate journeys of Sharon-Rose and Dimakatso, it challenges us to think beyond the binary, to question societal norms, and to recognize the full spectrum of human experience. In doing so, it asks viewers to reflect on their own identities and the ways in which we can create a more inclusive, compassionate, and understanding world for everyoneregardless of their gender, identity, or biological makeup.
Image credits: YouTube
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