How to Dream

Director: Alexys J Hillman
Release Year: 2021

Released in 2021, the documentary How to Dream, directed by Alexys J. Hillman, presents an intimate and educational exploration of the experiences of transgender individuals who are navigating or have completed gender-confirming surgeries. With a deep commitment to telling the stories of trans people from all walks of life, this documentary invites viewers into the lives of those who have faced various challenges - from societal discrimination to the life-changing relief of finding an affirming medical clinic.

 

The documentary sheds light on what it truly means to transition in the United States, particularly focusing on the arduous and often misunderstood process of obtaining gender-confirming surgeries. This series provides a platform for transgender voices, allowing them to share their stories of resilience, struggle, and triumph in their own words. One of the central figures in How to Dream is Alicia Jane Ryder, a 71-year-old transgender woman whose journey serves as a beacon of hope and inspiration for those in the transgender community. Alicia's narrative is a testament to the complexities and challenges of transitioning later in life, as well as the ongoing battle for transgender rights. Through her story, How to Dream not only chronicles the medical and personal aspects of transitioning but also highlights the importance of community, resilience, and advocacy. 

 

Alicia Jane Ryder’s journey is one of perseverance and personal transformation. Born in the 1950s, Alicia spent much of her life grappling with the disconnect between her gender identity and the expectations imposed upon her. It wasn't until later in life that Alicia found the courage to embrace her true self and begin the process of gender transition. In a conversation with Polish transgender blogger Monika Kowalska for her blog Heroines of My Life, Alicia opens up about her experiences with transitioning, activism, and her dedication to supporting the transgender community. Alicia reflects on her life as a 71-year-old transgender woman who has undergone a series of surgeries, a process that took 57 hours over seven separate sessions. 

 

Her commitment to her journey is evident in her accomplishments, having spent 51 years working in government service - 26 of which were in federal service and the remainder in Oregon’s state government. Alicia retired after a long and distinguished career, which she credits with giving her the skills necessary to lead and advocate for others. Alicia’s story also highlights the importance of relationships within the transgender community. She and her wife, who is also transgender, have been together for over 25 years, having married one day after same-sex marriage became legal. Their shared experiences have been central to Alicia's own activism and advocacy. She founded the Portland Oregon Transgender Service Providers Index (POTSPI), a community organization that helps connect transgender individuals with support services. With over 2,500 members from across the country, POTSPI represents Alicia’s commitment to creating resources for transgender people and helping them navigate challenges related to healthcare, employment, and legal protections. 

 

Central to the stories told in How to Dream is the role of gender-affirming medical care. For Alicia Jane Ryder, this care came through Dr. Toby Meltzer, a renowned plastic and reconstructive surgeon specializing in sex reassignment surgeries (SRS). Meltzer’s work is highlighted in the documentary, showcasing his groundbreaking contributions to the field of gender-affirming surgeries. Dr. Meltzer is best known for his innovations in neovaginal construction techniques, which have significantly improved the ability of neoclitoris to experience sensation. With over 3,000 surgeries performed, Dr. Meltzer is considered one of the leading surgeons in this specialized field. He practices in Scottsdale, Arizona, where he has gained a reputation for his expertise and artistry in providing life-changing surgeries for transgender patients. In Alicia's case, Dr. Meltzer’s skill and expertise were pivotal in her transition, and she speaks highly of the quality of care she received. She recalls that her surgeries, which amounted to a total cost of $240,000, were worth every penny. Alicia praises Dr. Meltzer as a “genius” and “artist,” reflecting the profound impact of his work on her life. 

 

Alicia’s journey is not solely defined by medical procedures and surgeries. Her personal life, love for fashion, and unwavering commitment to the transgender community are integral parts of her story. Alicia’s activism is driven by a desire to ensure that other transgender individuals have the resources and support they need to thrive. As someone who has spent decades advocating for transgender rights, Alicia reflects on her activism in both personal and professional settings. She was instrumental in bringing transgender sensitivity training to her former workplace, Trimet, a public transit agency in Portland, Oregon. This initiative helped create a more inclusive environment for transgender employees and customers. Additionally, she successfully fought for insurance coverage for transgender medical procedures, paving the way for other employees to access necessary care. 

 

Fashion also plays a key role in Alicia's life. Having spent much of her early life unable to express her gender identity fully, Alicia now embraces fashion with fervor. She describes her closet as a boutique, with a collection of dresses, leggings, and accessories that reflect her personal style. Alicia is unafraid to make bold fashion statements and encourages others to break free from outdated fashion rules. She believes that personal expression through clothing should be about creativity and comfort, and she urges people to embrace what makes them feel confident and authentic. Alicia’s love for fashion is matched only by her passion for supporting others in the transgender community. She believes that the power of community is essential to creating positive change and encourages others to support one another. In her small town near Mount St. Helens, she is well-known and respected, with people regularly stopping to thank her for her advocacy and contributions to the LGBTQ+ community. 

 

While How to Dream focuses on the medical and personal aspects of transitioning, it also acknowledges the ongoing societal struggles faced by transgender people. Alicia Jane Ryder reflects in the interview with Monika Kowalska on the challenges that transgender individuals face, particularly in relation to political opposition from the religious right and conservative lawmakers. She likens the scapegoating of transgender people to the persecution of Jews in pre-World War II Europe, emphasizing the need for solidarity and collective action to address these issues. 

 

Alicia's advice to transgender individuals facing discrimination or fear of transition is simple but powerful: “You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.” She encourages others to take risks, face challenges head-on, and never give up on their dreams. She believes that with determination, anything is possible - whether it’s transitioning, advocating for change, or pursuing personal goals. In How to Dream, Alicia's story serves as a reminder that transitioning is not just about medical procedures but about finding self-acceptance, building supportive communities, and advocating for the rights of others. Her message of hope, resilience, and love resonates deeply within the transgender community and beyond. 

 

How to Dream is more than just a documentary - it’s a call to action, a celebration of the transgender community, and a testament to the strength of individuals like Alicia Jane Ryder. Through her journey, viewers are offered a glimpse into the complexities of transitioning, the challenges of navigating healthcare systems, and the importance of finding supportive communities. Alicia's activism and advocacy provide a model for how individuals can use their experiences to uplift others and push for change. Ultimately, How to Dream serves as a powerful reminder that no matter the obstacles, transgender individuals can - and do - achieve their dreams. Whether through medical transition, personal growth, or community engagement, the journey is one of resilience, courage, and, above all, the relentless pursuit of authenticity.

 

via: IMDB

and Heroines of My Life

Image credits: IMDB

Interview with the cast: