Show: TEDx Talks
Title: Why I must come out
Release Year: 2014
Title: Why I must come out
Release Year: 2014
Geena Rocero’s TEDx Talk titled “Why I Must Come Out,” delivered on March 31, 2014, is a deeply personal and transformative narrative that explores the complexities of gender identity, self-acceptance, and societal expectations. As a Filipino-born American model and transgender advocate, Rocero shares her journey of self-discovery, offering both a candid reflection of her past and a call to action for greater understanding and acceptance of transgender individuals. This talk, rich in emotional resonance and societal critique, exemplifies Rocero’s commitment to breaking the silence around transgender issues, while simultaneously urging others to embrace their truth.
Rocero begins her talk by reflecting on the universal experience of being constrained by the expectations of society, family, and history. She eloquently states, “The world makes you something that you're not, but you know inside what you are,” highlighting the conflict between societal labels and one’s inner truth. This powerful opening sets the stage for her narrative, underscoring the central theme of her lecture - the struggle between the external roles imposed upon her and the internal desire to align her identity with her true self. From a young age, Rocero felt a profound disconnect between how society saw her and how she understood herself. She recalls an early childhood memory in the Philippines where, at just five years old, she wore a t-shirt on her head, telling her mother, “Mom, this is my hair. I’m a girl.” It was in these innocent moments that Rocero’s self-identification as a girl began to take root. She emphasizes that even at that age, her understanding of gender was not confined by societal norms or expectations. “Gender has always been considered a fact, immutable,” she says, but today, society recognizes that gender is fluid, complex, and far more mysterious than once thought.
Her journey toward self-realization continued as she grew older. By the time she entered the modeling industry, Rocero felt that her external appearance had finally matched her inner truth. “When I became a fashion model, I felt that I'd finally achieved the dream that I'd always wanted since I was a young child,” she reflects. But despite her success, Rocero confesses that she struggled with the courage to openly share her true story. While she had achieved recognition as a model, the fear of how the world would react to her transgender identity kept her from fully embracing her truth. Her experience mirrors a common sentiment in the transgender community, where the desire for acceptance often conflicts with the need for authenticity.
For nearly a decade, many people in Rocero’s life, including friends, colleagues, and even her agent, were unaware of her transgender history. This period of secrecy, Rocero admits, was her own version of “the reveal,” a moment when she could no longer hide her truth. “I was assigned boy at birth based on the appearance of my genitalia,” she explains, laying bare the reality of her early life. While society labeled her as male, Rocero always knew she was a girl. Her decision to come out, however, was not taken lightly. As she notes, society often imposes rigid boundaries on individuals, categorizing them based on gender, race, religion, and even their own bodies. “All of us are put in boxes by our family, by our religion, by our society, our moment in history, even our own bodies,” Rocero asserts. Yet, she also acknowledges that some people have the strength to break free from these confines, challenging the status quo and living authentically. She herself had the privilege of a supportive family, especially her mother, who accepted her for who she was. Many others in the transgender community are not so fortunate.
Rocero’s story is also one of advocacy and empowerment. As the founder of Gender Proud, a media production company that elevates the stories of transgender individuals worldwide, Rocero uses her platform to push for justice and equality. Her role as an advocate for transgender rights has taken her to influential spaces such as the United Nations Headquarters, the World Economic Forum, and the White House, where she has shared her experiences and fought for the recognition of transgender people’s rights. In her talk, Rocero emphasizes the importance of visibility and representation, stating that “gender identity is at the core of our being.” She reflects on her early exposure to the transgender community in the Philippines, where she participated in beauty pageants for transgender women. These pageants were not always glamorous - often taking place in remote provinces or under challenging conditions - but they provided a space for transgender women to connect, build friendships, and celebrate their identities.
Rocero’s experience as a pageant contestant, where she won several awards, helped to solidify her understanding of the power of self-expression and representation. She says, “Not a lot of people could say that your first job is a pageant queen for transgender women, but I'll take it.” Her move to the United States in 2001, made possible through a green card petition from her mother, was another pivotal moment in Rocero’s journey. After undergoing surgery in Thailand to transition, she was able to change her name and gender marker on her legal documents. Holding her California driver’s license with the name Geena and the gender marker F was a “powerful moment” for Rocero, a moment that she describes as her “license to live.” For her, this document was not just a form of identification - it symbolized dignity, acceptance, and the right to be seen as who she truly was.
Throughout her TEDx Talk, Rocero speaks to the deep injustices faced by the transgender community. She poignantly recalls the tragic death of Islan Nettles, a young transgender woman from New York whose life was cut short by hate. “For most of my community, this is the reality in which we live,” Rocero reflects. The transgender community faces systemic discrimination, violence, and prejudice, and the suicide rate among transgender individuals is nine times higher than that of the general population. To honor the memory of those who have suffered, Rocero mentions the global vigil held every November 20 for Transgender Day of Remembrance. She is keenly aware of the struggles that continue to affect transgender people, but she also draws strength from the legacy of those who have fought for justice. “I’m here at this stage because it’s a long history of people who fought and stood up for injustice,” she asserts.
In particular, she highlights the contributions of Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera, two pioneering figures in the transgender rights movement. Their work laid the foundation for the fight that continues today. Ultimately, Rocero’s lecture is an act of empowerment, not just for herself, but for the entire transgender community. Her message is clear: it is time to live one’s truth without shame or fear. “This is my real coming out,” she declares, “I could no longer live my truth for and by myself.” By coming forward with her story, Rocero hopes to inspire others to do the same, creating a world where transgender people no longer have to live in secrecy or fear. She ends her talk with a question that challenges her audience: “Will you?” The question is not just for those in the room, but for society at large. Will we choose to accept and support transgender individuals in their journey toward self-realization, or will we continue to perpetuate the systems of exclusion and discrimination that have long held them back?
In the Q&A segment that follows, Rocero reflects on the role of family and community in supporting transgender individuals. She stresses the importance of creating a space of understanding, curiosity, and dialogue for parents, friends, and allies. “Gender identity is in the core of our being,” she reiterates, urging parents to embrace conversations about gender with their children. She also highlights the nascent nature of the transgender rights movement, comparing it to the early days of the gay rights movement. There is still much work to be done, but as Rocero passionately asserts, she hopes for a world where transgender individuals no longer have to face the struggles that have defined their lives for far too long. In her TEDx Talk, Geena Rocero encapsulates the intersection of personal truth and social justice, offering a vision of a more inclusive world where all individuals, regardless of their gender identity, can live freely and authentically. Her story is a testament to the power of self-acceptance and the importance of community in the ongoing fight for transgender rights. By sharing her truth, Rocero has not only empowered herself but has also paved the way for others to do the same.
via: youtube
Image credits: YouTube - TEDx Talks
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